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Freewrite, not Freebird. September 10, 2014

Posted by phoenixaeon in Children's Literature, MA, Mindless rambling that you could do without!, Tempus fujit stupidus, Time to recruit the word beavers, writing.
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I am trying. I swear I am. I am really trying to hoof my Muse into action. And freewrites suck. So bad.


At the moment, I am reluctantly engaged in working out my flow problems. You see, my writing ability is about as able as my walking ability. Which is to say, not so able. My writing appears to imitate the few jittery jolting steps I am able to take during the day. Stop. Start. Stop. Start. Concentrate to place a foot/word in the right place so I don’t fall over. Make sure the hips/sentences are stable enough not to need some sort of edit to stay upright. It’s not fun. And it is all the wrong headspace, especially when all of the writing manuals keep telling me to go out for a walk. I bloody can’t go out for a walk! And going for a roll (because obviously I can’t stroll) takes so much planning and dependence on other people that it’s just not worth the hassle. The logistics of writing are against me from the get go.


So here I am. Computer on lap – because I don’t have a desk – static and locked up. Maybe I should use that as a starting point for a story, and maybe I will at some point, but right now I need to work through my inability to write through the inner critic. I need to impale the bugger on a lance of lexical confusion to shut it up for 15 minutes of quiet writing time. Sometimes, writing an essay with all the analytical jargon is that much easier for the WTF-is-she-going-on-about that it can create in the mind. I used to read essay stuff out to my Mum and she’d stare at me with glassy eyes and her mouth would be set somewhere between a smile and an Elvis Presley impersonation, and I knew I’d hit the technical mumbo jumbo just right. But writing fiction? It only creates chaos in my head thanks to my feelings of creative inadequacy. Hmph!


And now I will apologise to anyone reading this. Sorry for flumping my inner critical vomit into your eyespace and invading your brain with wah wah wah. Yes. I hear you. I’ll bugger off and just get on with it and stop moaning. Yes. I know I can’t write if I’m not actually writing. No. I can’t promise I won’t wah wah wah all over my blog about bouncing off the rubber walls of I-can’t-write again. And yes. I am off to try and break the inner critic’s camel-like back with a house made of words, with a lovely musical interlude.


Spam, spam, spam, spam… December 7, 2012

Posted by phoenixaeon in General rubbish, Mindless rambling that you could do without!, On Writing, Time to recruit the word beavers, Wordiness clouds, writing.
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Spam comments. Who needs ’em? Apparently, I do.

So, every now and then, I think “Let’s have a looksee, see if there’s been any spam that’s actually quality commentage.” The answer is almost always a resounding clang of NO, so I shufty off to see what else is happening in ‘netland, or crawl into the cavernous tunnels of Academia. But the other day a gleaming jewel caught my eye, and while the comment was still firmly located in Spamania it held a disheartening acorn of truth:

Hello, you used to write wonderful, but the last few posts have been kinda boring… I miss your tremendous writings. Past few posts are just a little bit out of track! come on!

To whoever opened such a blindingly observant can of cured wormmeat – YOU’RE NOT WRONG! I know I am on the dark side of the magical lexical moon, but I am trying to find the meaning of creativity (as has been mentioned in previous posts)! It is proving to be an elusive beast, more so than the Jabberwock or even Jar Jar Binks (much to the disapproving stares at the LEGO advent calendar he was so rudely puked out from!), but I am hoping that I am making ground on this cur to my blogging prowess.

Unlike Odin, I have yet to poke my eye out in the attempt to find wisdom, though this may happen at some point with a misplaced thinking pen, but the everyday depths of creativity are once again making themselves known to me. I plan to be free of my prison of ineptitude in the forthcoming months, so please bear with me in these dark times of inelegant expression.

I hope that for the moment this has slaked your thirst, sated your hunger, for voluminous verbosity.

The art of distraction. November 11, 2008

Posted by phoenixaeon in If I could sit down and just write I might get somewhere, Nintendo DS, The evil curs Writers Block and Low Selfconfidence attack, Time to recruit the word beavers.
The A Team

The A Team

Nintendo DS rocks.

My writing doesn’t rock.

Therefore, I wobble.

Must lock the DS away. Must. Use. Willpower. (What’s Willposer? That’s what I just typed and correctified!) Must rediscover writing portions of brain (damn pesky combat foxes that they are) and take them to the gym. Maybe shakle them to the pen? Could be a plan! I can feel a Hannibal moment coming on. Or maybe that’s just a ‘You ain’t gettin’ me on no plane, fool’ B. A. Baracas moment dressed up as a Hannibal moment coming on.

I feel my brain is on one today.

Autosports Awards. December 5, 2007

Posted by phoenixaeon in Autosports Awards, Building Car-sles, Time to recruit the word beavers.
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Last night, Dad and I did what we always do on a Tuesday; we watched Spooks, but made time to watch the second episode on BBC3. When that had finished, I happened to turn over and catch the end of the Autosports Awards (didn’t even know they had awards!). I’m glad I did, as Lewis Hamilton was there, scooping all the awards.

To begin, he won Rookie of the Year for his rookie year in F1. But then he won the next two awards, Best British Competition Driver and Best International Competition Driver. Fantastic as that was, I enjoyed the presentation of the awards by Viviane Senna more. Aw, he was so star struck! You could see he was getting all emotional when she compared him to her brother, Ayrton Senna. It was good to see. Made me smile, it did.

I still haven’t picked up pen and paper. My brain was mulching last night, however, on how to continue the story, so I think I may try and break my writing dam today. I am feeling a bit better about it, so today is as good a day as any (or, as my fingers tried to type, as food a day as any).

But first, I must build a ‘car-sle’ with Principessa.